Sweating on Gordon

Just a rant…
I work nights so set an alarm for two hours for now to see if I can get the GTD decision.
But in case I don’t wake up I have Ekeler currently in.

This could be the difference of me winning this week and I need it for my record.
I want them to rest Gordon up and see him healthy to carry the rest of my season but if I don’t wake up for the news and he DOES play and Ekeler does nothing I’m going to be so damn upset.

Why do I let fantasy football do this to me? (This isn’t even a money league!)